Imbecile…

From the March 25, 2009 hearing of the U.S. House Subcommittee on Energy and Environment. Gather round one and all… Watch Rep. John Shimkus turn into an imbecile right before your eyes ladies and gentlemen!

That just makes me sad… The bible as the infallible word of god? Has he ever really read the fucking thing? I wonder his thoughts on revelation… but I digress; he misses the verse right before he starts quoting, which gives the reasoning for god’s decision… (closest translation I could find was NIV…)

Genesis 8:20 Then Noah built an altar to the LORD and, taking some of all the clean animals and clean birds, he sacrificed burnt offerings on it. 21 The LORD smelled the pleasing aroma and said in his heart: “Never again will I curse the ground because of man, even though [a] every inclination of his heart is evil from childhood. And never again will I destroy all living creatures, as I have done.

22 “As long as the earth endures,
seedtime and harvest,
cold and heat,
summer and winter,
day and night
will never cease.”

He’s using Noah’s animal sacrifice to the lord to get the lord to not kill every living thing again, and god agrees. His selective quotation from the passage (cutting out “The LORD smelled the pleasing aroma and said in his heart”) makes me think he doesn’t actually believe the story, and therefore just likes the phrases involved with this pointless fable. Also, the statement “every inclination of his heart is evil from childhood” is one of my main problems with religions, and he reads that without removing it… Why is it, do you suppose, that that is quoted in the context of arguing against global warming… I’ll let you all figure that one out for yourselves… Back to my point about religion though, the blanket comment “you are evil in your heart” comment which comes from religions and cults is an easy way to (once convinced) get a large group of people to follow those few who claim to know how to get back into the “good” territory.

Anyway, just to pass along something that really made me laugh hard. These are quotes read from text taken directly from online christian fundamentalist forums. Enjoy…

Some of this is Poe’s Law in action I think…

Bill Hicks Remembered

The 15th anniversary of the death of legendary comedian Bill Hicks is coming up on February 26 of this year. In commemoration of this, David Letterman had Hicks’ mother on his show on January 30th, and he finally showed the stand-up routine that was censored several months before Bill died. He has become one of my top 5 comedians as I’ve poured through his past albums (which I would highly recommend anyone check out), and this was a very nice thing for Letterman to do (as well as taking the blame for the censoring)… Anyway, the standup act itself is in the 3rd part (if you just want to skip to that…) Enjoy…

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

One of his better bits right here as well…

Last words… if you will…

Nuggets of Wisdom

That’s really the only way to describe this:

Vote.

That is all…

Vote.

Barack Obama Goes Reggae

“He knows what the right decision is…”

A mother who was an atheist is nothing to be afraid of. A father who was a muslim is nothing to be afraid of. This woman is afraid of anything without a cross apparently, and even those with crosses aren’t off her radar if they don’t hold those crosses at just the same angle as she does…

It’s a shame that McCain has decided that, instead of fighting the scare tactics used against him in 2000, he’s going to fully embrace them for all the electoral votes they’re worth…

Here’s the consequence of this meme of McCarthy-esque scare tactics…

I don’t have words so fill in your own… or use Katrina’s…

….I think I know what the right decision is…

Hey, I don’t remember this Garbage Pail Kid card…

Considering how prescient that is it must be worth some money… if you still have it in A+ condition that is…

This is why some Christians terrify me…

That smile is absolutely evil… I mean, how can you sing the lyrics he is singing and be so smiley and happy?…

Lyrics:

Please excuse me sir do you belong here
Cause if not, we’re gonna make you leave
This place is only for the holy
This place is only for the free

We’ll rule the land with love and fury
We’ll baptize everything we see
So if you pledge allegiance to the holy
You can play a role in victory

But if you don’t you’re sure to be defeated
Just like every other enemy
So either give your heart to the cause before you
Or spend a thousand years down on your knees

I pledge allegiance to the Bible
I pledge allegiance to the church
I pledge my life to the cause of justice
And with a gun I’ll show you what I’m worth

All I have is what the Lord has given me
So this hate inside must be divine
Besides we have a moral obligation
To purge the world of all whom he denies

So let the war to end all wars begin now
Let the kingdom come on earth today
And when the streets run red and the dust has settled
With what’s left we’ll start again and again and again

I will one day march in the infantry, ride in the cavalry, shoot the artillery. I will one day fly o’er the enemy, cuz I’m in the Lord’s army.
(Repeat)

I’m in the Lord’s army (3x)

I know these guys are just some douche-bag Christian alt-rock band, but those lyrics are appalling… I’ve been trying to let this go for the past hour or so, and I just can’t… It’s the whole “You can’t have Jesus without the apocalypse”…

So let the war to end all wars begin now
Let the kingdom come on earth today
And when the streets run red and the dust has settled
With what’s left we’ll start again and again and again

You want the world to come to an end? Then rebuild a theocracy? Wow, that sounds like a great idea… Where do I sign up?